Failure. It's something we've all experienced from time to time. But is it really that bad? I've found a few helpful secrets to fix failure.
To learn and grow we need challenges. If everything is easy and comfortable, chances are, you aren't growing!
We need to feel comfortable with the uncomfortable, and realise when we don't achieve our goals, or if something happens to destroy a dream, it is actually a great learning opportunity.
When I (finally) left the father of my oldest children, I was devastated. I thought I'd failed life. All I'd wanted (at that stage in my life) was a happy family unit. I couldn't imagine myself as a solo mother, I didn't believe in myself. I didn't have confidence I could do it!!
In the months after leaving, I learned so much about who I was and the strength that I possessed. Because things got worse before they got better. I experienced more drama and trials than I did beforehand. These experiences helped me to realise my decisions were right, and I really was better off raising my children on my own.
I learned how strong I was, I learned how capable I was, and I was motivated to seek happiness.
If life is average, (which mine totally was before the adventure of having children and experiencing domestic violence), then the highs aren't that high, and the lows aren't too bad. Things vary between "all good" and melancholy.
Sometimes (and be careful of this), people get addicted to abusive relationships because of the variety of emotions. The devastating blows of abuse send you down into a dark space, and the overwhelming passion of reconciling can send you higher than anything else, creating a vicious cycle of highs and lows. Not that different from the highs and lows people experience through other forms of addiction.
But when you can let go of attachment, and let yourself plummet to your low (please talk to people as you descend), you'll do some incredible learning about yourself. It is from this space that you are able to ascend to new heights, you can achieve more because of new found strength.
It is from the lowest points that we can rise the highest, so don't take failure to heart, it is how you move forward that matters most!
You only fail when you think you fail. The reality is, if you keep going forward, and if you persist, you will work through the truth. Failure is really just a set back. Failure can, and will only ever be failure, when you give up.
So don't give up, persist. Keep moving forward. Reach your highest peaks and embrace the challenges your set backs provide.
Just imagine what a different place the world would be if people like Edison, Henry Ford, Nelson Mandela, Mahatma Gandhi, Richard Branson and Elon Musk gave up at their first encounter with set backs!!
What have you learned from your set backs? Do you give up or are you motivated to persist?
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