Back in early 2009 my life felt like it had fallen apart. I had finally built up my courage to leave an abusive and drug addicted partner. I was about to start a life on my own with my two young children. My youngest was only a few months old, my oldest, not yet two years. At the time I was lost in depression. I didn't feel anything, I didn't know who I was. I had no interests, or hobbies that I could think of. I didn't know what I enjoyed. I called myself a dead man walking. I needed to find a way out, a way forward, so I could feel anything better than misery, anger and hurt. My existence was far from any dream about what my life would be like.
Eventually, I found my way to the library, and began exploring the philosophy, spirituality and religion sections. I stumbled upon the book, The Key to Living the Law of Attraction by Jack Canfield. This book told me I had to start telling myself my life was wonderful, I needed to cultivate an attitude of gratitude, and I needed to create a list of goals. I needed to begin creating my dream life.
I started out with my affirmation, "My life is awesome". At the time I felt completely ridiculous. I didn't think walking around my house repeating "My life is awesome", would change anything. But I had nothing to lose, so did it anyway. I remember one day one of my children had pooped in the bath, I was cleaning the bath out, laughing to myself as I repeated (even a bit sarcastically), "My life is awesome". I had no idea I was beginning the process, putting my dreams into creation.
I purchased a notebook, and wrote down three things each day I was grateful for. Some days it was a little difficult, but most days it was refreshing to look back on the day and notice that there was always something to be grateful for. This solution was one that I instantly benefited from. I felt better about my life, and where it was going.
Finally, I started dreaming up some goals. The book I read suggested making a list of 101 goals. This was based on a story that when you set 101 goals, it is highly possible you will achieve them in your lifetime. Now writing 101 goals is not easy. It forces you to set some 'unrealistic' goals. I say 'unrealistic', because at the time you are writing them down, they seem unrealistic, but as you grow and learn, you begin to realise 'unrealistic' is just a perception. Anything is possible once you begin to work on your thoughts and begin to see your dreams becoming real.
These were three strategies I used to begin creating my dream life. In a short space of time, I went from a very dark, unhappy place, to a positive place, full of hope, dreams and possibilities. Before the end of 2010 I had dramatically transformed my life, I began writing my first book, Domestic Violence on Ice, and I had set in motion some of the habits that continue to lead me towards achieving my goals.
There are two goals I wrote down that I reflect on and realise how far I have come. One was to live abroad for a year, the other was to travel the world with my children. At the time, both of those seemed like impossible, 'unrealistic' dreams. I moved to Bondi, Sydney in 2011, and have remained in NSW until now. My new husband and I have planned to live in Spain for a year, and travel the world with our children. This dream isn't too far away, making some of my biggest dreams a reality.
What does your dream life look like? What stops you from making it happen??
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